Buyers market

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The elections are finally over. Amidst the false promises and shoals of
money distributed by the political-bandits, in the world’s largest
democracy, honesty took a back seat covering her face and weeping
silently. But who cares – the victors have the authority to rule, loot and
plunder for the next 5 years.

The ministry formation exercise saw the extreme thirst of the various
political parties to serve the public. Some felt that unless they are
given “railways” they can not serve the country. Some one else felt that
they needed telecom or road transport or shipping portfolios to serve the
people better. We dumb individuals can not see what they see – perhaps in
our limited wisdom we foolishly think that some of the main problems India
is facing today are related to education, poverty and healthcare. My
servant maid, Rami’s husband is a drunkard. He needs 70 Rs per day for his
drink and once a week he needs to visit the doctor – costing her 80 Rs for
auto-rickshaw, 100 Rs for the doctor and another 100 Rs for the medicines.
He refuses to go to work – he is too weak to work – but strong enough to
beat his wife when she refuses to give him money to drink. Their children
study in a government school – where the classrooms double as toilets –
yes, there are no toilets in the school – and the classrooms will not even
pass muster as the toilets in our homes. Even though her daughter is
studying in 8th standard, she does not know to converse in English, can
not write her name in Tamil without error and does not know what a
computer is. But these are not problems for our political parties who want
railways or telecom or road transport portfolios. They want to serve
India.

The same people served India during the last five years. What difference
did it make to Rami’s life? A year ago, the drink was 60 Rs, auto-rickshaw
cost was Rs 70, doctor charged 90 Rs and medicines were 95 Rs. But did she
sense anything wrong in the system? No. She curses her fate and argues,
“What can they do? They were kind enough to give us Rs 200 for each vote
this time”.

So, India is the knowledge capitol of the world, our software exports have
exceeded 70 billion, and per capita income has increased by 14% and
inflation has dipped to 0.2%. The finance minister in his sonorous voice
will announce these in the Parliament to the thumping of desks of his
party colleagues and Rami will also see the news on TV till she gets
disrupted by the sound of her husband vomiting in the house.

Long live India.

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he following is the conversation between Lallo Prasad Yadav and Bill Gates.
Gates : Hi! you must have heard of Windows.
Lallo : Oh yes! In most govt. offices we have the single window clearance concept.
Gates : At home have u installed Windows?
Lallo : I have removed all windows due to increased burglaries in our house.
Gates (Confused): Then what is the system you operate on?
Lallo : OPERATION ? Yes I had a Hernia operation last month.
Gates (Sweating) : Hope the internet is being used a lot in India.
Lallo : Oh Yes! Due to increased mosquito problems many people are sleeping under the net.
Gates : By the year 2000 India should export computer chips.
Lallo : We are already exporting Uncle Chips.
Gates (Feeling very Uneasy): do you regularly use LapTops?
Lallo : My grand-child sleeps on the top of my lap.
Gates (Heavily Sweating): The Chief Minister of Andhra Pradesh knows a lot about RAM and ROM.
Lallo : RUM? Prohibition is being lifted and it will be shortly available in A.P..
Gates(Feeling Dizzy): I would like to take your leave before my system crashes.
Lallo : I have exhuasted all my leave.
Gates : I have no energy left let us go out and have a bite.
Lallo : BITE? I believe in non-violence. I will not bite.
Gates : (System Crashes and Found Missing). “Windows is restarting.Please wait………….”

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Deccan Chargers’ batsman Rohit Sharma has been named as the best Under-23 player of the second Indian Premier League which concludes here tomorrow. Rohit was selected unanimously for the award, which carries a cash prize of Rs 10 lakh, by former India captains Sunil Gavaskar, Ravi Shastri and MAK Pataudi, the adjudicators of the award.

In yesterday’s match, CSK lost royally to Bangalore. It was because of their poor batting line up and third class fielding.

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IPL’s second season will end soon. We still have 6 matches to go, and we’ll surely see a few more outstanding individual performances. But the ‘top 10′ or ‘top 20′ list of this IPL’s top performers is now unlikely to change. Matthew Hayden settled down at the top of the list after about the 20th match, and he looks likely to stay there. He has scored 546 runs with remarkable consistency. His strike rate of 145 is equally remarkable in a tournament where average strike rates have dropped by more than 20 runs.

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The USCIS on Tuesday said it has so far received approximately 45,500 H-1B petitions counting toward the Congressionally-mandated 65,000 cap. As such, the USCIS would continue to accept petitions subject to till the cap is reached. USCIS said it has received approximately 20,000 petitions for the advanced degrees category. However, it would continue to accept advanced degree petitions since experience has shown that not all petitions received are approvable, the USCIS said in a statement.